super

not that super - the other one - for retirement. I got a call from one of my super funds today. Yes therein is the problem - one of my many funds as I have worked in a lot of places and have a few funds around costing money. So my super isn't super, actually its not even great. At one time I did purposely keep two funds as one was what my employer was paying into and the other had a really good life insurance benefit, but now I seem to have lost control. There are funds floating around, sometimes multiple policies due to my erratic work since having kids. Also since having kids, I haven't really had the time or energy to sit down and find all the stuff and sit on hold trying to roll them into one place. So today, back on the change I am going to give myself 2 weeks to do it. (It has to be a realistic goal!) Hopefully I can sort it all out!

words

today I gave someones words more power than they deserve. they were just thrown into conversation, and probably forgotten, yet they resinated all day with me. i don't even know if they are true and its from a long time ago - but I let it change my whole mood - my whole day. I was cranky and didn't follow through on any of the things I had planned. Luckily the big squirrel had taken Alexander to play golf -which they enjoyed - so I could spend the day knitting and trying not to think. The little boys played in the garden and these words kept coming back to me.

I realise that it is not the words so much, it is me giving them power. I should be able to control how I feel and not give this power to others. I could so not be a celebrity.

Knitting is all done, now just have to sew it all together....

inspire

(a still from Dali & Disneys animation Destino)

Destination - National Gallery - Salvadore Dali Liquid Desire

Participants - Moi, Alexander and Mr P

Transportation - Tram and Train

Isn't it funny when you decide things are going to be one way and they end up somewhere totally different? I was worried about the gallery being too 'stuffy' for a prep student but it wasn't.

Having rung in advance, we knew it was busy. Alexander was still excited about the tram ride. The lady at the sales desk looked distracted and tired. Mr P bought his ticket - no smile. I asked for an adult and a child - and she asked how old. I don't know why, but I was like, no really - he is a child he's only 5! To which she lit up in a broad smile and announced he was actually free (not the information previously collected, but I agreed with her). Then, she was chatty and explained a childrens tour/activity.

We were greeted very enthusiastically at the door of the exhibition, at about 3:45, and the doorman decided not to take our tickets - usually reserved for after 4pm, so I can actually go again for free. I told you a good mood is contagious.

The exhibition was different to what I had previously seen and really enjoyable for all of us. Certainly the highlight was the short animation collaboration between Dali and Walt Disney. It was beautifully fluid and almost hypnotic and really captured the surrealist spirit. Worth a trip.

create

Yet another really rainy day and it gets harder to keep everyone entertained inside. Today we made cubbies using sheets and chairs and made cookies to eat picnic style inside the cubby. Pegs and fitted sheets work the best.
We also pulled out some of the craft supplies. I got these great flat pack paper trucks from the reject shop some time ago. I think there were 8 in the pack for about $5. We had a great afternoon colouring and building them, and then of course playing with our various trucks.

story

The boys love a story and will often try to convince you of more than one. They just love them and it is a lovely treat to have the story read by Grandfather last night and then today to spend some time with him.

play

A rainy school holiday day was the perfect opportunity to catch up with my godchildren, which has been proving harder given our school committments. It was pouring and we decided to meet at a pub with a free play centre which is much more economical than paying for every child and then food on top of that. We thought we were so clever thinking of this, but as time rolled on, it seemed everyone else at home with kids thought of it too and there were literally kids hanging from the ceiling!!!! Not really what I call relaxing. I will say, I could always find my boys as I dressed them in bright shirts.. (sorry poor image taken on my mobile)

beach

We left the cloudy skies in the city to visit friends at the beach today. Halfway there the clouds cleared and the sun came out. I had even packed beanies but needed sunhats! Glad we just decided to go, the kids had a lovely time together, we had a nice time - oh and no prize for guessing that this cheeky little monkey below ended up in the water. It did take a little longer than I thought.

magic

our family 'outing' today was off to the local shopping centre to get Alexander some new runners. I cant believe how quickly their feet grow! While we were there the kids were totally mesmorised by an old school magician that could get a bird to appear out of gloves and poop on command. He really did have some great tricks and it kept all three boys entranced.

work

Alexander is on school holidays for two weeks, so rather than the focus being on me and changing, now we need to keep him entertained. Today it was lovely to see him with his dad outside working together. They had found an old skateboard on the side of the road for hard rubbish collection and salvaged it with the idea of doing it up. So far they have the wheels off, have sanded it and given it an undercoat. The idea is to paint it like ben 10's omnitrex. I think it is just wonderful to see them working together.

family

it has been a very social weekend! Today we caught up with our extended family. When we were children, our extended family was very close. With my nana as a lynch pin we would regularly come together to celebrate everyones birthday and special events. Even when Nan passed, we kept up this tradition, often seeing each other over a number of consecutive weekends. As we grew older and our lives all changed, these became less and less regular and now we hardly ever see each other, some of them haven't even seen my twins.

Today was a special event where we came together to celebrate a significant birthday and it was really nice. There is a heap of little kids although they weren't all there. As my boys don't have any actual cousins, we call the children of my cousins cousins. Sounds very greek/italian I know, but it is also nice to know where you came from. One 'cousin' is a similar age to Benji and Spencer and has the same red hair. It was a nice relaxing afternoon and real celebration of family.

(the boys were tired and very happy to be home!!)

new friends

(some of the kids from a trip to the museum)

a night out chatting, and more chatting without the now tribe of kids(6 mums have produced 16 kids!). I had a mums night out (MNO) with the girls from mothers group. A great little group of girls who I have know for almost six years, and we still meet reguarly each weekly but with the kids it is hard to have a good chat.


I remember when I was first pregnant and thinking about meeting other new mums, and being really hesitant (Robyn - is that an understatement?) about joining in on that whole thing. I assumed I wouldn't connect with any of them. Now I think it is the most important thing you can do as a new mum. The people you meet may be different but they are all struggling with the SAME STUFF. If there is an open forum where you can discuss stuff without being judged this can be the biggest help. Luckily that is what I found. A group of girls where you can sit and chat, and laugh and the hours just fly by.....

connect

(random shot of phillip island pier)

Sometimes I think I take on too much, then I will flip and drop everything, and I mean everything and everyone - withdrawing. I am starting to see a link with this and my iron levels (weird) and am on a course of injections which seems to be helping...i digress....

So, rather than crawling into a hole, I am trying to find a balance. It is important to connect to the community and be involved not only in my life but also that of the kids. Today was about that. I spent a joyous hour at school assisting with reading. This is such a great way to see how things are going in the classroom an get to know Alexanders classmates. Then it was off to kinder to meet with the teachers, getting the twins read to start next year. Finally after a family dinner, some time for me off at pilates.

sleep

sometimes you have to make big changes to make little changes. I think sleep is often elusive for parents of small children. I think pregnancy was a training ground for light sleeping. It never was a problem, but now if I actuually get to sleep I really am only half asleep. Oh how I long for 8 or even 10 (maybe thats greedy) hours of consecutive deep sleep.....
I am not interested in drugs but we did take a step towards a solution - a new bed - king size. As there have often been little visitors in our bed at all hours, now there is room for us all!

Happy Anniversary

Eight years today. Another day (or maybe year) I will have a picture of the dress. It seem so long ago now and our lives are so different now, but so much richer. Here's to many more babe - lets enjoy the ride. Happy Anniversary

time

Alexander went to a birthday pool party at the local YMCA. It was such a well organised and fun party, not something I have every heard of before but a really great option. After the party, we stole some time together. It is really rare for Alexander and I to actually get one on one time and I think it is so important. We wandered aimlessly around Chadstone, just chatting. We didn't need to be anywhere, do anything and there were no distractions. We sat and shared a drink before heading home. It wasn't a long time, it wasn't particularly interesting venue, but it was important and special to both of us. This change is to make and find time.

grow

I have mentioned before that if my thumbs are any colour they are black as opposed to green. I like a nice garden - just would prefer if someone else would do it for me. However I also think it is important for children to be exposed to the garden and have the opportunity to learn and explore. They need to know where the food comes from and how hard it is to grow. I would really love to have a garden like the greek and italian imigrants in the 70's where every tree was a different fruit tree and with the well established vegie patch rather than a manicured lawn. Maybe I can work towards that taking baby steps.

Today we started (or restarted) our vegie patch. While Benji and Spencer slept, Alexander and I enjoyed the sunshine and some quiet time together. I got some seed raising packs from a kinder fundraiser and Alexander read the instructions (all by himself) and we planted tomato and lettuce. I have some other seeds to plant but we are taking baby steps on this one. It will be a long while before we are self sufficient!

clean

i bought a jazzy little window cleaner at the supermarket today and actually used it! (its like the enjo one but only cost a fiver) Within about half an hour and I did both the inside and outside of most of our windows and what a difference it makes. I think about these jobs for so long, but when they are done I feel so much better.

Alexander had another production today - this time just the preps. He was a goat and it was just too cute. The new video was utilised - hopefully you can see it.

unwind

Between the big squirrels work and meetings I need to attend, I have been missing our regular knitting sessions. I was getting to a point where I was going even without knitting, just to catch up and knitting was becoming a chore. Having said that, I have found some projects that appeal to me. They are quick and easy and can be gifts. I have actually been having fun and relaxing withh the clicks of the needles and its something I can do while watching the little boys. I am starting to 'get' knitting.

prepare

dancing to walking on sunshine

Alexander's school concert was on tonight. He had been practicing and was very excited. A late start at school and a big audience was daunting for all of us. One for the boy on stage and the other for the two little ones in the audience.

Let's start by saying we saw the whole production - no tantrums no issues. Alexander was really good and had a great time.

How - we were prepared - which is new for us. We started getting ready early - really early. We had to be at school at 7pm but we ate dinner at 5. Everyone was dressed and ready well before 6. My bag was packed with treats and drinks and anything to distract/keep quiet Benji and Spencer. We arrived early which meant we got great parks. I had bought tickets early so we had dress circle seats. Arriving early, we had a choice of seats and we chose them with easy access to the door and a good view - in the front row. The hall was fairly empty when we sat down, so the boys entered easily and without issue. We sat and all enjoyed the show.

This is so far from our normal it is not funny. Normally we are running looking for things, yelling, chasing, shoving food in, late - basically unprepared. Experiencing the difference today means we are going to make time to be prepared.

order

...before....

You may already know but I have some .... control...issues. One of these, yes one of many, is my clothes. First - there is a lot of them. But in my defence I make most of them with bargain fabric and hold on to them for a long time. With a high rotation, they don't get worn that often. I found a dress still on rotation that is over 16 years old. So, a little obsession is clothes and shoes.

So, with this little collection obsession goes one of my issues - putting them away. I am quite particular as to how things go away and would rather them not go away, than be in the wrong spot. So, I can live with a pile of clothes on the floorthat I have to sort through and iron from(floordrobe as Julia coined but I have long been practicing) rather than dealing with finding a shirt in the jacket section, or a tshirt in with singlets!

I cannot explain nor really understand my logic, but I am today saying GOODBYE to my FLOORDROBE. What this means is that I have to actually put my clothes away. I can live with my little obsessions:

• of the hangers all facing the same way- ideally all matching hangers;
• the clothes all facing the same way (hanger hook facing left when looking at front of garment)
• like garments togethers - skirts, shirts, knits, suits/jackets
• garments colour coded from white to black within their section

I don't think this is weird but apparently others do - so I shouldn't tell you that I fold and colour order my undies?

happy fathers day

Wishing all the dads a happy fathers day.

We had a lovely day - and went with the flow.

An early start - present opening - breakfast out - bbq lunch at ours - watch new dvd - early to bed.

try

The boys have been winning lately. Their behaviour - or rather lack there of, and the tantrums have stopped me doing things, or even wanting to do things. They won't get into the pram - the mere mention of it causes a major meltdown and the thought of chasing or carrying two two and a half year olds (who are not very light either) fills me with terror. As a result I have been doing nothing and going nowhere.

Whether we have turned a little corner in their development, or I am coping a little better - who knows, but today I went out. I had all three kids, I picked up mum and we cruised Knox City. We didn't do a lot of it, and we didn't have anything in particular that we needed so it was a good opportunity to give it a try.

Throwing caution into the wind, we approached the centre. The kids walked and they were all good. I'm not saying marching like the sound of music kind of kids, more like the matching curtain wearing ones - still having fun, but listening, walking together, wandering. And it was nice. Nice enough to try again and restore my faith that we can do it - I just have to keep trying.

Oh - and Benji has gone off the toilet again which makes wandering possible.

smile

It is true what they say that your attitude is contagious.

I have spent too long wallowing, resenting what others are doing, what I'm not doing, not getting. The only thing this does is makes me unhappy. When I am unhappy I spread this around quicker than swine flu in an airplane. Then when I have made everyone unhappy, I am even grumpier because everyone around me is just awful....NO MORE.

Today's change - is to smile. Sounds simple - the idea is that this should be just as contagious, and make everyone feel better. Even today after such a short time, I noticed an attitude shift in the boys and I am not as agitated by things that would normally drive me mental. Their behaviour is better and this means that we have even ventured out, also making me happier. We are managing to negotiate situations before they erupt and the mood is much calmer. Who would have thought?

control

Todays change wasn't mine - seems we are all getting into it this month! Actually it is Benji - who has suddenly decided he doesn't want to wear nappies. While I knew this time had to come, I wasn't rushing it, and also waiting for warmer weather (where at least they can go outside!) But, apparently it is not my choice to make, so this afternoon, with a sugar withdrawal headache, we spent most of the afternoon in toilet.

Goodbye my friend...

Today's change is giving up my good friend - refined white sugar, that comforts me in my nice hot cup of milky tea. Not as big a change as yesterday, but they cant all be! Still this will be a challenge in itself. No longer a white and one, just white (maybe that will be another farewell?)

Also hello to my new friend. I broke my bucket cup by knocking it on the stone bench (it has claimed a few victims) but here is its replacement. While not as big, seriously surpasses the old one in the groovy stakes. It is china and the lid and the brown are silicon. My new friend for my new tea...

Change

Photo from Flickr - flightlessXbird

Today I made it to breaking point. It has been coming for a while but today was just too much.

The morning was spent -

• using nappy wipes to clean black texta scribble from a school library book (which works)



• chasing a defiant child to get dressed



• stopping the car and putting a child on the footpath because he kept getting his arms out of the car straps and refusing to put them back in



• dealing with two screaming children in car due to other one being on footpath



• 'footpath' child having yet another episode at the Glen, where he didn't want to be in the pram. Every old lady tried to help, but it was a fight I had to win

This was all kinda normal, but it was when I was reading Naomi's and Julia's posts and was interupted but the phone. Yes, just the school principal ringing to let me know she had had a 'meeting' with Alexander, and he was in TROUBLE - more so with me than school.

Turns out the whole school thing was a bit of an overreaction and is simple playground issues that we have been trying to deal with for a while and hopefully this has given us a new strategy, but getting that kind of call from the school was all too much.

So - I have decided to make a change. Much like Naomi drawing a line in the sand, or Julia's month of gratitude, I am making this September my month of change. Every day I am going to change something - whether it be a simple clean, declutter, finishing something or like today a change to routine.

Tonight I was in control. We had a nice dinner together at the table, did readers, bath and bed. I know it sounds simple but I was sitting on the couch at 8:30 with all the kids asleep in bed, the dishes done and things relatively tidy. The twins were asleep before 7 which is amazing around here and I have tried to approach things with a happier demeanour - which seems to be working. Lets hope the times are a changing!