When I grow up

What do you want to be when you grow up?

This was the question put to me by my 7 year old tonight.

"You know you can do anything you want Mum", he continued, "as long as you are here in the morning to take me to school and in the afternoons to pick me up"

Well, there it is. While I thought it was darling that I still have the opportunity to grow up, it really made me think. I always talk to the boys about being able to do anything that they want, but hearing it come back to me is really confronting I suppose. I did however get a little giggle about his 'restrictions'.

With the boys growing up and gaining more and more independence I have started to think about working again. I have been lucky enough to be able to stay at home - well in a sense it was almost easier than trying to arrange care for three boys - and cheaper not to work frankly. That being said, I do miss the work environment. I like finishing a task, chatting with adults about rubbish tv. However, I don't think that I want to go back to my old career....

I used to work in HR - both internal and external recruitment in the pharmaceutical industry. Sounds thrilling I know. I really liked it - particularly internal HR - but now, with my own family, I don't think I could go and be the "Mum" at work. You know, the adjudicator, policy setter, basically the fun police. It is hard enough at home, but to do the same stuff with adults who are getting paid!! No thanks.

Which leads me to now. The wonderland - with a lot more wonder. What is it that I would like to do? Really the question isn't so much about me now, but my family. I do want to be there in the morning and the evenings after school - at least while they are little. I do want to be available for school holidays which there seems to be an awful lot of. I don't know what people do who only have 4 weeks annual leave per year do for the other 9 weeks a year their kids are at home?? So I am working it out in reverse and seems like I am crossing out the things that I don't want to do. Maybe if I keep going I will actually narrow it down to something I do want to be....